Oh, New Jersey.
What are we going to do with you?
Only in New Jersey would a mother compare a trip to the tanning salon with “taking your daughter to go food shopping.”
Patricia Krentcil was charged last week with child endangerment when her five year old went to school with a sunburn and claimed she went “tanning with Mommy”.
As you can see, Mommy loves to tan.
The local news has described her as “golden brown”, but I think it looks more along the lines of “charred”.
Leather Face claims that her daughter does not go into the tanning booth; rather, she stands in the room while Mommy tans. Or someone else watches her. Or runs wild while Mommy gets her cancer fix. Or something. It’s hard to tell because the story keeps changing.
Anywhoo, although an investigation is still pending, Leather Face appeared in court today to answer to the charges.
She plead not guilty. Of course.
Patricia, if you look in the mirror and experience anything different than the rest of us do (which is complete and utter horror), then you’re an asshat.
Do you really think a judge with half a brain and decent eyesight is going to look at you and think you’re NOT condoning tanning?
Seriously. I have a 35 year old saddle that looks better than you.
You, Patricia Krentcil (aka Leather Purse Face and/or New Jersey Tanning Mom), need a swift kick to the overly tanned and wrinkly ass for 1. Teaching your daughter that it’s perfectly fine to LOOK like that, and 2. For risking her health by taking her to the tanning salon in the first place.
Kill yourself with cancer all you want. I really don’t care. But your child deserves better than that.
A CHUCK NORRIS ROUNDHOUSE KICK TO THE TAINT FOR YOU!
PS. We all know Chuck Norris hates asshats but do you know what he loves? Taste of the Tropics Margaritas.